Drugs don't help (from personal experiences)
Don't get me wrong they are awesome

Some medicines such as painkillers and anti-inflammatories are good when used sparingly so you get back on your feet. Some are fun and they can open up your mind real good, like mushrooms or weed. Some give you a temporary boost like coffee and nicotine. The rest, like white powders, salts, injectables, pills, blots and other shit, will fuck you up. It's not a judgement call, know what you're getting into. Your consciousness is expensive and rare and precious. Ready to talk to the machine elves?

All drugs are subject to abuse, even the high from sex. Truth is, you are good as you are, flaws and suffering and everything. Even your ugliness is beautiful.

Stay away from drugs. It's a trap. You are free.
(porn is a drug too, one of the worst)

malevolent resentment

Enabling is tolerance of bad habits that in the present time might not be a big issue. It is akin to sweeping the problem under the rug under the guise of being nice. Over time, garbarge accumulates, attachment is strong, and it becomes a bigger, more complex problem. Love negates enabling. Love isn't nice; it's tough. It is a source of change. It is hard on the receiver of such love, and even harder on the person dishing out the tough love. But it is completely necessary, for the good.

My friend Yalan told me once, "it's time to be your own mommy and daddy"

When you are an enabler of yourself, it is easy to get trapped in a cycle. This can take many forms of addictions and hopelessness. The enabling feels like "love", if one feels like a rejected person, but it is merely a suffocating cover that lets the wounds fester underneath. Tough love for oneself makes one worthy.

There is someone out there that never rejects you.